Carmens - old school of tapas - Oct 2011

Going out in Clapham on a Saturday night is like opening a window onto a circle of Hell occupied exclusively by the mediocre. Roaming gangs of lairy, leery beery estate agents and office staff, mix and mingle in a too horrid ballet of booze and weak party drugs. Weekend nights a little like fresher's fair at one of the universities popular with public school spawn who fail their Oxbridge entrance exams, Bristol for example. Yes, it's like a Saturday night in Bristol.  


Yet it's nearby, and there's a good range of eats and so we often end up there pre or post cinema (I think that Dr Vole is more of a fan than me of the area...) Of the many restaurants that line the arterial high road, there's enough choice, and it's not bad in the main. I'm a real fan of the Pepper Tree for a quick and cheap Thai kick, Gastro on Venn Street as an old fashioned French bistro I've had some very good meals in and Eco, a passable pizzeria. The other regular favourite has been Carmens, though the last visit reminded me why I'm falling out of love with a certain sort of tapas restaurant, and have been too spoilt elsewhere in the last couple of years. 


Rickety wooden furniture, tobacco coloured walls and brightly coloured detailing in reds and yellows, it's got the look of the first tapas restaurant you ever went to. Even before you pick the menu up you know what you'll find, and you're not to be disappointed.. Sangria by the jug, patatas bravas and a variety of things fried. Sadly Carmens (like Meson Don Filipe in Waterloo) is trapped in a bit of a timewarp and there's none of the interest in provenance, innovation or passion you'd expect to find at Jose, Morito, the Opera Tavern or any number of other infinitely more exciting outlets new and old.


It's difficult not to play it safe on the menu, but less than a week later I struggle to recollect what we ate. It was fried, and overly salty in the main, though there was enough of it to fill us up from the four plates we shared. Patatas Bravas and pimento de padon were fine, the former slightly undercooked and the latter laden with salt and flabby, like tiny wrinkled green balloons. A portion of thin sliced pork shoulder steak, a regular special on the board at Jose, was grey and over cooked disappointment. A fourth dish of spinach and chickpea was perfectly fine, though also a little salty. 

   

Relatively safe food, friendly staff and a wallet kind bill ensure that Carmen's is never empty and if you are in Clapham it's not a bad option on the night. If you're looking for great tapas however, join the 21st century. There are so many better offerings out there and simply being better than La Tasca is simply not enough, even if your market is as undiscerning as this.