Dishoom - August 2010

Where: Dishoom, St Martin's Lane

With who: Drama Queen and the Booker
How much: Starters around £3/£4 and mains between £7/£10. We spent £20 a head with drinks.


There's something very egalitarian about chain restaurants. They simply don't care who you are and aren't at all bothered about trying to impress you specifically. No bookings, you turn up, wait your turn, and get the same service as everyone else. In his excellent review in the Guardian, Jay Rayner recounts how he had to stand outside in the queue with the rest of the rabble too, slightly discombobulating I've no doubt, for a man used to a certain level of recognition. After a late afternoon meeting over wine (the best sort of meeting) me and my two guests thought about staying in the rarified atmosphere of the Ivy Club but in the interests of investigative research joined Mr Rayner and other food luminaries by queuing at Dishoom. 


Dishoom has been referred to (mainly by the PR team) as a Bombay style cafe. An egalitarian, open all hours canteen serving taxi drivers, students, writers and lawyers (according to their puff anyway)...None of those stereotypes were notably present on the night, predominantly, our fellow diners were more the middle class braying London types you traditionally find clogging up the greener parts of zone 2.


There's got to be a book written for this. 'Food Branding 2.0 - lessons for the post Pizza Express generation'. Like the equally insipid Jamie's Italian next door, and 'gourmet, authentic Mexican fine dining experience' (more PR bullshit) Cantina Laredo next door to that, the team behind Dishoom seem to have swallowed the whole volume, hook, (press) line and sinker. It's somewhat sinister having all three of them next to each other. It's the kind of line-up better suited to touting for passing trade outside a Croydon multiplex rather than prime real estate in the centre of London. 


The food is casual, safe and generic Indian (at risk of insulting a large country). It doesn't seem to come from anywhere specific, and certainly didn't bear any relation to what (admittedly little) I know of the hot, spicy street food of the region. For a coastal city, you'd expect fish to feature heavily, the best they could do was a 'Dill Salmon (that well known Indian fish) Tikka'. Our starters included Bombay Sausages, a student dinner party staple of the future fusing chipolatas, onion and curry paste, Chilli Cheese (on) Toast, pleasant but utterly underwhelming, and a dish called Keema Pau, minced lamb in a ragu style sauce served alongside a muffin.  These came with fridge fresh pickle pots and a highlight, perfectly chilled Meantime Union beer. 


Our main courses were similarly pedestrian. The Chicken Biryani was nicely presented in a clay pot with a pastry seal but arrived dry, beautifully but subtly fragranced and lacking in a core ingredient. "Do they serve the chicken on the side?" questioned the Drama Queen, apparently not, it was just hiding (very well) in the rice. The taste was as subtle and shy as a thirteen year old at a school disco, it felt like nothing more than an accompaniment. The Spicy Lamb Chops came with some semblance of taste and some of the vim and zing you'd expect from a decent kitchen. Beautifully cooked, tender and juicy, they were the one high point for me. The final plate, a Lamb Boti Kebab was dry again and chewier than expected. When the Insider called and summoned us back to the Ivy, we didn't have to think too long and hard. 


There's a niche in the market for a chain Indian, and Dishoom gives a good argument for filling it. For anyone who's ventured within a mile of Tayyabs or Lahore in the East End, or been to some of the great curry houses of Birmingham, Southall or Bradford you're going to be left wanting. That being said, if you're stuck in theatreland with kids or random relatives who "don't usually like that spicy foreign stuff", you could do worse. And if that isn't damning with faint praise, I don't know what is.